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Singapore. They are too tired from work, busy with the kids or just too shy, it seems Singaporeans are not making love as often as they would like.

Men in Singapore had sex 5.2 times on average per month - even though they would ideally like to be doing it 8.7 times - said a survey commissioned by drug maker Pfizer.

Singaporean women also felt they were somewhat lacking in romantic encounters, although they were slightly less enthusiastic than the men. They had sex 5.5 times per month, but would rather be doing it 7.3 times.

The same pattern emerged across all 10 countries surveyed by Pfizer, which makes erectile dysfunction drug Viagra. Its online poll featured 3,282 respondents sampled at random from countries such as Malaysia, Indonesia and China.

In Singapore, 301 people - 150 men and 151 women - took part in the survey, which was carried out between October last year and this January. The participants were aged between 31 and 74 and had all had sex at least once in the past year.

The survey showed that, on average, the "ideal" amount of sex is 10.5 times a month for men, and 8.8 times for women.

Martha Lee, a clinical sexologist, said that for women, tiredness and the demands of motherhood could be a big reason why their love lives are often put on the back-burner.

"Women here are also primary caregivers of their children, so by the time they have taken care of both their work and their kids, they are often too tired to have sex," she said.

Lee, who conducts sexuality and intimacy coaching at her company Eros Coaching, added: "Women sometimes think of sex as a 10-course dinner, where they will want to do this or that before culminating in the actual act."

Men, on the other hand, sometimes just want "McDonald's".

"But many of them (both men and women) are shy about asking for what they want in the bedroom, so if you have difficulty talking about it, it is more difficult to have sex more often," Lee explained.

Professor Peter Lim, President of the Society for Men's Health (Singapore) suggested another reason why Singaporeans are not having sex as often as they would like.

"Earning money and job aspirations rank higher in the overall hierarchy of wants," he said.

Both experts agreed that other factors that could lead to less-than-desirable sex are erectile dysfunction and work-related stress.

This kind of stress is the reason W.S. Ng and his wife have sex only "once in a while".

Business development manager Ng, 35, lamented: "I work from 8am to 6pm, and sometimes I have to do sales calls from home until about nine or 10 at night. How to find time to have sex more often?"

Reprinted courtesy of Straits Times Indonesia. To subscribe to Straits Times Indonesia and/or the Jakarta Globe call 021 2553 5055.